From the onset, I'd like to make it clear this piece is somewhat tongue in cheek. A bit of fun if you like? How seriously you take my suggestions is of course up to you. However please remember the old adage 'Many a true word is said in jest'.

So much time and positive energy is spent by coaches on twitter putting the games ills to rights that I thought I'd draw up a quick fire 10 point manifesto as my contribution towards getting the beautiful game back on track. So here goes!

1. Variety Is The Spice Of Life

Let's imagine when you were a kid your Mom made the best Sunday dinner in the world. You adored this meal so much you wanted to eat it every day. But luckily for you she had an Italian friend who you'd visit once a week for the tastiest pasta ever. Your Dad also liked a Chinese takeaway, so every Saturday you'd get stuck into a Chow Mein. And once a week your Mom would cook an Indian style curry. What the hell has this got to do with football you're probably asking? Well what if food was coaching? A bizarre question to say the least! Please stick with me here.

Who made the rule a child must have one coach, and one coach only? Why can't a player be coached by multiple coaches? A confident coach will be happy for his players to experience different styles and methods of coaching. Even if they are inferior to yours, 'your' player will enjoy and learn from new experiences.
I'd love to see all members of a team attend an independent skills centre too and those that attend a skills centre get involved with clubs. Why spend your life eating, and then learning to cook Roast Beef and Yorkshire Pudding when you can learn to prepare and eat Spaghetti Bolognese too? A secure coach will welcome this logic. An insecure coach will treat their players as possessions. Which are you?

2. The Green House Effect

Well intended or not, positive or negative, shouting adults on the sidelines are a pain in the back side. Whether it be commentary, praise, battle cries or aggression, the kids don't want it, they don't need it and they shouldn't have to listen to it. Respect barriers are a nice, positive development. They stop the idiots actually encroaching the pitch. But what about the noise? They can't stop noise. So what can we do?
I propose every parks pitch has a green house on the side of the pitch. Any parent who can't keep their big mouth shut has to watch from the green house. They can use their hot air to do something positive. They can use it to help grow tomatoes and the kids play in peace. Everyone's happy.For serial offenders, when the green house isn't working, I propose a Panna Death Cage be erected pitch side. Put the worst Mom's, Dad's and Coaches in there and let them go head to head. Let's see what they've got!

3. Staying Alive

Why is Physical Education still the poor relation of Reading, Writing and Arithmetic? Yes the three R's are very important in life but do they directly extend your life? PE can help keep you alive! The 3 R's won't help prevent debilitating illnesses or fight obesity. Healthy body health mind right? Why does a teacher have to be qualified or experienced teach to teach any particular subject other than PE? Why is PE the poor relation? Any teacher is often allowed to muck in and take a games session, sometimes resulting in kids participating in brainless activities like running round in circles or minimal participation games like Rounders. I'd like to see the powers that be pass legislation or directives that make PE at least an equal to the three R's. Not the poor relation like it is now. Once children arrive at high school sporting achievement should be held in the same esteem as academic achievement. This is a subject which really deserves an entire blog all of it's own. For now, I'll leave it at that.

4. Dress To Impress

Who's seen that coach who looks like they've got dressed in the dark, or bought their attire from a jumble sale? Do children deserve these people as coaches? We need some enforcement here, desperately! I'm advocating fines for coaches in denim, wellingtons or sandals. Flip flops would result in an automatic life ban.
In all seriousness, a coach leads by example. If they look like a tramp, act like a slob, then players will naturally mimic this behaviour. The coach should be the sharpest guy at training. Both inside and outside their body!

5. Good Enough You're Old Enough

U7's, U8's, U9's, 10's, 11's, 12's blah blah blah. Why? An 8 year old can be as physically and mentality developed a footballer as a 10 year old. Some 11 year old's couldn't get into a good 9 year old's team. So can't junior clubs have squads of say 40 players spanning a 3 year age span and then pick 4 or 5 teams accordingly? Sometimes or similar ability, sometimes mixed ability.

The word I'm getting at here is 'development'. Players should be playing with similar but different age groups to challenge them and their own personal style of learning. I'd suggest most kinetic learners would benefit from a game with the older kids, who they can learn from. Although I appreciate this isn't always the case and confidence must be maintained.

Rightly or wrongly Michael Owen, Joe Cole, Wayne Rooney etc were all tearing up trees as teenagers playing with and against seasoned pro's 10,15 & even 20 years their senior. What's happened to these guys since is another blog all of it's own, but hopefully you take my point, which is pigeon holing into strict age groups can be detrimental. Again, this is probably something which needs dealing with in a lot more depth!

6. A League Table Of Respect

My feelings about points and leagues for U10's is well documented, so I'll spare you another rant on that subject. What I'm thinking here is if adults can't beat their addiction and craving for recorded and published competition between young children, then why not go about it in a positive way? A 'League Table Of Respect' if you like. Referees give out and take away points for behaviour of players (who usually aren't an issue) and adults. Points could be given out for the least amount of garbage the ref hears from each set of supporters, conduct and attire of coaches, and how about a special bonus point for no smoking on the touchline?

Parents could race back to their PC's to check the league table and other results, then phone their mates to gloat about how well behaved they've been. Then at the end of the season there could be a giant, flashy trophy for the winners. The adults would love this I'm sure.

7. Footballing Ian Beale's

Yes you read the sub heading correctly! An actor called Adam Woodyatt joined Eastenders as a 16 year old to play a guy called Ian Beale. Some 25 years plus later Adam is still Ian Beale. This is no slight on Mr Woodyatt, he plays the part well, has had a great career and I'm sure he enjoys his work. All good then right? Apart from to many Adam isn't seen as an actor, he is seen as Ian Beale. He is typecast. If he turned up in another TV show or film nobody would critique him objectively. Everyone would just say, 'Oh look it's Ian Beale'.

For years this is what we've done to footballers. At young ages we've looked at physical attributes and declared 'you're a defender' or 'you're a striker' etc, etc. Yes sometimes I know kids make these decisions themselves, but it's our responsibility to ensure they can, will and most importantly enjoy being to play anywhere on the pitch. As they reach their teens a preferred, specialist position will be inevitable and sensible. But this mustn't be rushed. We don't want another generation of footballing Ian Beale's.

8. Sensible Street Football

We all played football in the street as kids right? But it doesn't happen any more. Many factors contribute and are blamed. Consoles, traffic, fear of abduction, health and safety issues. All of these issues were around in the 80's when I was a kid but I still spent every spare minute playing football, as did most of my friends. I'd love to see a government/FA campaign to bring back street football.

Yes we all remember the crazy old bloke who'd shout out the window 'If it comes on my garden again I'll stick a knife in it'. But there are many parents who'd like to see a game in the street. With a bit of joined up thinking it could happen. No soggy, window smashing caser balls for starters. Sensible soft balls only and perhaps parents taking shifts to stand at end of cul de sacs to ensure nobody gets run over by a car speeding round a corner. Perhaps I'm dreaming out loud here? But hey, I know us adults can do more here.

9. Girls And Boys

Girls dance and boys play football right? Wrong! At the pre schools I visit my football sessions consist of half boys and half girls. In many instances the girls are far superior in every way to the boys. Pre School Dance teachers I've spoken to say the same about boys. So why when they hit 5 do I never see the girls again? And the dance teacher never sees the boys again? Because we're a nation. Of shallow minded sexist pigs that's why!

I know the FA have made strides with girls football but what I'm talking about here is integration. At young ages they should be playing along side each other. I know it's better now in terms of girls being allowed to play with boys, but it's still not encouraged, it's still not the norm. Why? In 2012, why? I appreciate at a certain age, for various reasons girls will need their own leagues. But at U10 they don't and we should be seeing more of them. Looking at the big picture, the more people who get into football regardless of sex, race or religion the better for the long term future of the game.

10. Don't Expect Suggest

Nobody likes being told what to do! Me, you, our football club, The FA, whoever. That doesn't mean we should give up trying to improve football for the better. Yes a lot of this rant is tongue in cheek. A bit of fun, and I'm not so daft as to think the vast majority of these suggestions will ever see the light of day! But we should never stop dreaming, never curtail our will to make football better for everyone. Keep suggesting but go easy on the expecting. Keep chipping away at what you believe in and one day, it won't happen over night, but one day it might just get better.

Thanks for reading. Any feedback appreciated as always either here or on @CoachDaveLKFC on twitter.
Ps. Don't bother feeding back to say some of these ideas are ridiculous. I already know that, thank you!